Here is a curated collection of some of the dumbest, cheesiest, and most hilariously awful pick-up lines sourced from Reader’s Digest, wikiHow, and internet lore. They are grouped by their specific flavor of absolute nonsense. ๐ The Tech & Internet Disasters Wi-Fi Connection: Are you a Wi-Fi hotspot? Because I am totally feeling a connection. Google Search: Is your name Google? Because you have everything I have been searching for. Laptop Overheating: You are hotter than the bottom of my laptop. Low Battery: I have 4 percent battery remaining, but I spent 3 percent texting you. Autocorrect: Are you Siri? Because you autocomplete me. ๐ The Grocery Store Nonsense Fine-Apple: If you were a fruit, you would be a fine-apple. Cute-Cumber: If you were a vegetable, you would be a cute-cumber. Sneaking Snacks: I want to take you to the movies, but they don’t let you bring your own snacks. Chicken Pun: If you were a chicken, you would be impeccable. Spoon Feeding: Are you soup? Because I want to spoon you. ๐ Outright Cringey & Nonsensical The Appendix: Are you my appendix? I don’t know how you work, but I feel like I should take you out. Wisdom Teeth: Are you my wisdom teeth? Because I feel like I should take you out as soon as possible. The Booger: If women were boogers, I would pick you first. The Pinky Toe: You remind me of my pinky toeโshort, cute, and I will probably bang you on a table later. The Flat-Out Lie: Did we go to different schools together? ๐งฎ Geometry & General Nerdiness Acute Angle: If you were a triangle, you would be an acute one. The Alphabet: If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put ‘U’ and ‘I’ together. Lost Literacy: I used to be able to recite the alphabet, but now I can’t get past ‘U’. Optimistic Robot: If you were a Transformer, you would be Optimus Fine. Star Trek: If you were a phaser on Star Trek, you would be set to stun. โ๏ธ The Classic “Illegal” Cheesy Lines Parking Ticket: Are you a parking ticket? Because you have ‘fine’ written all over you. Aggressive Tripping: I didn’t trip, I just fell for you aggressively. The Map: Do you have a map? Because I just got completely lost in your eyes. Scraped Knee: Do you have a Band-Aid? I scraped my knee falling for you. If you want to use these, tell me who you are trying to impress (or annoy). I can help you pick the perfect level of cringe or even write a custom joke tailored to their specific hobbies and interests. Post navigation How to Be a Really Bad Blind Date! Red Flags! Watch for these on your first date.